Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Creative Release

"If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you."
-from The Gnostic Gospel According to Thomas 

 Since the advent of my twenty fourth year, I've been living in sin with the tall, darkly handsome Pablo. Calm yourself. I know this is big news.

 The deliciously passionate trysts we were meant to share have thus far gone by the wayside, though I yearn for it deeply and ache in awareness of the absence. Priorities that stamp impatient feet and throw vile tantrums when ignored get the best and bulk of my energies. Quiet but equally real needs settle to the bottom of the river Time, forgotten silt left out of its inexorable currents. 

 Pablo waits, still, without complaint. His silence not insolent but filled with fidelity, eternal patience and profound understanding. 

 I remember yet again that denying creative energy its nurture and release is putting the soul in a satisfaction chokehold. Time invested toward deep and personal needs is recouped by lifted spirits - especially when time is its most illusive and menial tasks clamor for undivided attention. By all means work, commute, pay taxes, attend to the tedious - and every now and then, give Duty the bird and paint a picture. Even if it is total garbage.  

  For the record, Pablo is an easel. A beautiful creation of finely stained wood given me by a dear and thoughtful friend. We have an upcoming rendezvous with a blank canvas and all the passionate color my liberated heart can throw at it. 


1 comment:

haikitay said...

Oh Oh...oh I love reading your writing